We all have phobias. Right? I have and have had for years a love-hate relationship with Jim Henson's Muppets and Sesame Street. I loved the show growing up, and my favourite channel was the Kermit Channel (the takes they did on the Fine Young Cannibals' 'She Drives me Crazy' and Surfari's 'Wipeout' were amazing, not to mention Manamana!). I always thought Oscar the Grouch had the ultimate bachelor's life, that Bert was a banana, that Miss Piggy was gross and that Big Bird was a girl. Yet, the Cookie Monster, that purple Count von Count, Snuffleuppagus and the rest of the crew kept me up at night. Indeed, one of the earliest nightmares I have is of Big Bird in a terrorist's bandana jumping out of the screen at the cinema and machine gunning my friends and I. And strangely, this is before I even knew what a terrorist was (subliminal messages ARE that powerful).
Why do I have this irrational fear? Because Muppets have NO EYELIDS. They don't blink. Their eyes bulge out (which is a characteristic they share with fish, of whom I also am slightly afraid). In fact, what I dread the most is being locked into Jim Henson's warehouse at night. All the muppets are staring at me like zombies, like they'll come to life any minute. Imagine that, and you won't be so quick to laugh at me.
The reason this came up all of a sudden is because the other day, my friend came to uni wearing a Cookie Monster shirt. And there they were, those HUGE goggly eyeballs. Now I was in a pickle. I'm trying to become a better Muslim and hence try to lower my gaze when talking to members of the opposite sex, in accordance with the Quranic injunction. But the problem is, everytime I'd look down, the Cookie Monster would stare back at me…with those eyes. So I'd look back up. Then down again, and so on. Now, my friend wears that shirt just to piss me off. In an effort to prove to me that my fear of muppets is irrational, she sent me this video:
Okay. So that's ONE video with a Muppet with eyelids. An EXCEPTION to the rule. Besides, if this video convinced me that my fear was irrational, my fear wouldn't be so irrational after all. Duh. And blind or not, I don't like Andrea Bocelli.
Why do I have this irrational fear? Because Muppets have NO EYELIDS. They don't blink. Their eyes bulge out (which is a characteristic they share with fish, of whom I also am slightly afraid). In fact, what I dread the most is being locked into Jim Henson's warehouse at night. All the muppets are staring at me like zombies, like they'll come to life any minute. Imagine that, and you won't be so quick to laugh at me.
The reason this came up all of a sudden is because the other day, my friend came to uni wearing a Cookie Monster shirt. And there they were, those HUGE goggly eyeballs. Now I was in a pickle. I'm trying to become a better Muslim and hence try to lower my gaze when talking to members of the opposite sex, in accordance with the Quranic injunction. But the problem is, everytime I'd look down, the Cookie Monster would stare back at me…with those eyes. So I'd look back up. Then down again, and so on. Now, my friend wears that shirt just to piss me off. In an effort to prove to me that my fear of muppets is irrational, she sent me this video:
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